long weekend.

i'll be honest. i live in a bubble of "cant happen to me" a lot of the time. i always have. life rarely gives me a kick in the ass, but it did this weekend.

i woke up on sunday and texted my mom to ask what we all were doing that day ;) she said i was just like my gma (who also always wanted the plan earlier than anyone else) and we decided on target.

they said they were leaving. i said "no wait 10 mins! doing hair!"

she called me and said they were going to grab some food and asked if i or any of the kids wanted some. i said to get a sausage biscuit for aidan. and off we both were from our houses. sawyer and EJ stay home to do some house stuff.

i pull into the target parking lot, mom and dad arent there yet and so we sit. reese whines for her bottle and aidan belts out kelly clarkson's "you dont know a thiiiiiing about me...." while we wait. finally we decide to get out and wait inside target at starbucks - so i unbuckle aidan and get her out and then my phone rings.

let me say here - i screen calls. i really, even with a business, dont answer my phone for numbers that i dont know. but i did. i dont know why, but i did.

me: hello?
her: hey, you dont know me. your mom gave me your phone number.
me: ha. okay? (at this point, im thinking its a client or inquiry)
her: your parents got into an accident... they are okay..

the rest is a blur. somehow she sort of told me where they were located on the 121 access road, but honestly, i didnt need directions. as i was coming from the other way, i could see the multiple firetrucks and ambulances. i lost my shit. i had called EJ and said i would update him as soon as i could.

when i got there, i pulled past and parked safely and ran to get an update. the lady who called me already was on her way to my car. she and her boyf were the first there and who got my parents out of the car - she actually was an EMT for another city. miracle, huh? a fireman came over to tell me all the same things... that they look bad, but that they are okay. i went to my dad who was still on the ground, lost it *again*, held his hand, said i loved him, but he said he was okay (despite the blood and dirt covering his entire face) and to check on my mom. i went to my mom who was already in the ambulance (and whose face was completely unscathed), told her i loved her, too and she asked the same things about my dad. so worried about each other... 

the fireman said which hospital they were going to so i called EJ to tell them i was going to follow. at this point, im so uncontrollably crying that he said no and to park and that he'd be there with sawyer to drive us all. so i park and wait. and puke. and then wait.

in the car, i prayed with aidan. she didnt really know what was going on bc i didnt let her *see* the accident. i had just said that nonny and papa were hurt by a bad driver and that we were going to go make them feel better. and then we prayed.


EJ got there and got into the driver's seat while i was left to my own devices. not having to think about anything except for what i saw. it doesnt matter how many people say "they are okay"... what if they arent. what if that was it?

we got to the hospital and went back and forth from room to room. thank heavens i did not miss the note that the nurse had written on her glove from my dad to my mom. so him. she got it down perfect. something about thanking God that it wasnt worse and that he loves her. i wish i could remember it exactly. but it made me want their kind of love 38.5 years into marriage like that...

my dad LOOKED the worst, but my mom was hurt worse. EJ wasnt even sure if the girls should come in and see my dad, but sawyer wanted to see it all. she told him "papa you got a bleed. you need a band-aid" (to which she later bought spongebob and camo band-aids with EJ at the store for him). lol when they cleaned my dad up (like, got the dirt out of his ears, teeth, head, and belly button lol), it looked better - basically he got horrible road rash on his scalp. so a layer of skin is just... gone. his eyes are swollen from the debris, but he can move around more.

my mom's face was perfect. not a mark. not anywhere, i dont think. but she hurt inside. her sternum is fractured and it hurts to do anything. this is rough for the woman who does everything (too much, probably) for everyone. i am certain most of you know that my mom is my best friend. her mom was her best friend. i can only hope my girls and i have the same relationship i have with my mom. so this whole thing was just mind boggling to me. like... how? we go to target every weekend.

long story short(er than it could be), i stayed there last night to make sure that they could have help if need be. but this whole 24 hours has (selfishly? i dunno) shaken me up. yeah, im also almost 37 weeks pregnant and, well, a little more emotional than normal. all day today, while driving, i thought "oh. that could have been an accident right there... or there...". i think it takes more than 24 hours to shake the "what could have happened" feelings. bc what could have happened is just... its not for now.

{eta: i wanted to add - when we went to the house to swap cars, etc for the night, i told aidan we were going to stay at nonny and papa's house. she said "bc they your parents? sometimes kids have to take care of their mom and dad..."}

now lets talk how it happened. here's what the cops think: you know how in cop shows, if they hit the back of a car, they can send it in to a spin and it will stop? thats basically what the kid did to my parents. only after spinning, it flipped 3 times. and the guys truck ended up on my parents car. (youll see pics below). they were truly surrounded by angels. there is no way that they should be as "okay" as they are.

***pics below of the 4runner***

i took 1 at the accident. bc i knew they'd want to see it later. little did i know that my dad would have wanted me to get a "better angle" LOL ;)




today, EJ and my dad went to the tow yard to get the stuff out of the car that was left/tossed out/etc.

you can see why my dad had road rash. holy shiz.








and just a link if you want to see my dad's head. im not posting it bc its gross, but he did want a pic to see what it looked like *after* they cleaned it at the hospital (before a shower, though) - but its bloody, so...

http://farm8.staticflickr.com/7014/6711695303_3c13106e17_z.jpg

so thats it. im tired. im emotional. and im blessed. blessed that i have 2 amazing parents alive and healthy - albeit sore. and in pain. and tired from barely sleeping at all. but here. here to be the best parents and nonny/papa for decades more. because any less than that is just unacceptable. ;)

last night, the couple who showed up first called me. the boyf was like "i dont even know your name. this has been bothering me all day, but i just remembered we called you from OUR phone... how are they?" he told me how he knew you shouldnt move people from accidents, but that the car was smoking and they were worried - so they did it anyway. i cried, thanked them, and then thanked God that there are people out there like them. people who care. 

please remember how quickly life can change. it only takes a few seconds...

2under2. twice.

aidan and sawyer are 19.5 months apart.

sawyer and reese are 21.5 months apart.

perfect, in my opinion. and i would not have it any other way :)

some days are crazy. some days i want to curl up and sleep. some days are filled with 100% fun. some days are lazy. some days are busy with errand after errand. but EVERY day is filled with sisterly love.

its amazing to watch, really. aidan and sawyer are the best of friends.


they love reese. if you were at my house and said goodbye to A and S and didnt say goodbye to reese - they would remind you.

they kiss and hug each other for no reason. or just walk up to reese and tickle her. i love having close in age sisters (well right now at least. talk to me when they are 13, almost 15, and 16.5 haha)

anyway, there a few things that i've learned in the past few years that helped me transition into life with 2 under 2. twice.

1. chinese fire drill. well, thats what it sort of seems like getting kids in and out of the car. now i put reese in, aidan gets in and does her chest clip, i get sawyer in, then i reach and finish aidan's buckle. phew. but getting OUT is a different story. i grab reese's bucket and unhook aidan. then they both come with me to sawyer's side. aidan has been taught to "hold the car". always. i started doing this so long ago and now it is 2nd nature).

2. one thing that i always tried to remember when having a toddler and a newborn is: if both kids are sad - grab the toddler first. your newborn wont remember that it took you 5 seconds to hug your toddler. but your toddler WILL remember that you picked the new baby first.

3. when feeding the baby, have a box or bag or something new and fun for your toddler. something that you bring out only when you are feeding the baby so your toddler has something fun to do! new markers, paper, fun stickers, etc... it will distract them from the fact that you have to take a few mins to tend to someone else (when, i mean, theyve never had that before lol).

4. give your oldest jobs for the baby. my kids love to help pick out clothes, get diapers and even FEED reese :)


and its worth it to let them try to do all of those things - bc then they feel so wanted. when i was BFing reese, i gave aidan the job to tickle her feet so reese would stay awake! lol something simple, but she felt a "part" of it all.

5. prepare. and prepare early enough so your older kid has no idea things are related to the new baby. if youre gonna switch rooms, switch beds, take away the bottle or paci (thats for another post though lol) then do it long before your due date.

6. dont give too much freedom too early. i know a lot of people think "oh yay! i'll let my 18 month old stand in the cart!!" ok, well great, now what are you going to do when you dont want to wear your newborn and you want to put the bucket in there? or "woohoo! my 16 mo old can walk next to me at the store!" ok, cool - so how exactly are you going to chase him when he decides to walk the other way when you have a newborn sitting right there?

but then again, im of the vein "if it ain't broken - dont fix it". i keep my kids in carts until they straight up can step out themselves. lol my kids stay in cribs until they want to have a bed. ::shrug::

7. when walking into a store or somewhere, every kid has to be touching me or part of the group while walking. right now, i carry sawyer AND the bucket and aidan holds on to reese's seat. but if i wanted sawyer to walk then she'd be holding my hand while i held the bucket and aidan held that. i get twitchy when i see toddlers just putzing along without hold on to anyone.

8. make sure you make time for yourself. shower every day. get ready and GO OUT! 2u2 will make your head spin if you sit at home every day. put on some makeup - even if youre not in the mood to. go get a mani/pedi during naptime when your dh is home. SOMETHING for yourself.

im lucky bc i get to do things pretty much whenever i want to. of course i dont always want to ;) but if a friend asked me out for drinks one night - then likliness would be high that i could/would go. at least for a little bit. if i didnt have relaxation time - i would go nuts. even when friends come over, its such a fun nice release :)

9. schedule your day. essentially, 2u2 is no different than 1 (routine wise) if you have a rough schedule. youre just adding one more body. 1 more kid to feed. 1 more to change and get dressed. 1 more kid to bathe and put to bed. its a lot easier to take in if you look at it that way. our routine is crucial to our day. it can be as lax as "craft or store in the mornings" but something IS more or less "planned". we aren't just putzing around (most of the time) all willy nilly ;)

10. have fun. just relax. if you need to do housework - do it as a game. fold laundry together and talk about colors. have a ball mopping the floor and giggling. whatever it takes - have fun :)

the store.

::twitch::

ok, here's the thing - i love LOVE going to the grocery store with the girls.

90% of the time.

the other 10%, i think "wow, this facebook group has never been so true!!"

let's start out with GETTING to the store. i have 3 kids in carseats. none of them can FULLY put their straps on.

1. start the car from inside. bc its f'in hot here right now.
2. get stella (the "i may chew things up" JRT) in her cage. which is funny in itself and usually consists of aidan and sawyer chasing her yelling "IN YOUR CAGE, STELLA!!" lol
3. then aidan orders sawyer to "pick up the toys cobalt would eat" and they go in the toy thing that we have downstairs.
4. make sure all have shoes. well, just aidan really. lol sawyer sits in the cart so if i can't find them - eh...
5. get reese in her bucket seat.
6. head to the garage. all of us. i set reese's seat down in the garage. open up the car door for A and S and send A to the "trunk" lol (aka the third row where her seat is) and then lock S in her seat. aidan is capable of clipping her chest clip - so she does that.
7. go get reese, clip her in the base, then reach OVER her seat into the back and clip the rest of aidan's seat.
8. ::breathe:: get into my own seat.
9. put on rockin' music. ;) or "hey soul sister" aka the hey hey song according to the girls by Train. and then get to driving.
10. sing a lot.

ok so. the rest with 3 isn't so bad. as long as ive gone when they are in good moods. aka like 930-10am. ish. and try not to go past an hour. snacks, drinks, stickers, etc are a must. the bucket seat goes into the cart, sawyer sits up top, and aidan walks. and by "walks" i mean "putzes" but whatever. i would wear reese in a wrap, but the problem is that if sawyer then wants me to carry her - then id be in trouble and have no place to put reese etc etc... so anyway, i pile shiz in the cart around the bucket and then underneath. (this is if i go alone. a lot of the time, my mom meets me, we have to 2 carts and its easy breezy - usually lol) or we get the BIG carts - i'll explain that in a min.

anyway, today was one of those "10%" days. ::twitch again:: (EJ was at home with the cable guy. and hey, its father's day. he can have some quiet time, right? lol) we go in. (which requires me to carry sawyer AND the bucket. and aidan holds the bucket or my purse haha. because, i didnt care about the shoe situation when we left. oops)

aidan wants the BIG cart with the seat belts. she told me that in the car. well, its sunday - family shop day - and there are none where we enter. but we go searching for them. we grab a diet coke from the target food place and then head looking - finally find one. i strap sawyer into the seat and aidan hops in too.

reese is now hungry. oh really? now?!?! so she is crying. i pick her up and think "ok, i can hold, feed, and push this cart, right?" perfect.

i had put my diet coke on the cart thing that A and S were sitting on. annnnnnnd SPLASH. my diet coke flings to the ground. as if to mock me. and say "amanda, nice try. but this day is going to continue to be a FAIL." we *happen* to still be at the front of the store and there are paper towels right there. so i try to clean it up as best as i can while holding reese, explain to aidan its not her fault bc she keeps saying "sorry mama", and get going moving.

my mom texts me: hey we're on our way.

YES. SAVED!

sparing you the details of the rest of the time, i'll get to the other good stuff. sawyer no longer wants to sit in the cart and accidentally flings goldfish on the floor, and then she walks around barefoot. and tries to try on clothes while we shop for a new bathing suit for aidan and some summer stuff for reese. reese just wants to be held the entire time (first time ever she's been AWAKE at the store), and aidan walks around with my dad like she usually does until she wants a hot dog. sigh.

i swear to you, this stuff only happens on the wkends. during the week, its smooth sailing. its the other 90%. we have fun. we laugh. we talk about colors, food, animals, etc. i love it. it really makes me happy to have fun with them.

today, i am thanking my lucky stars for naptime :) and thats okay i think. at least im going to tell myself it is.